Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Nerds of Yore: Part 1

We nerds are much maligned in society. We are sneered at as being uncoordinated, unwashed, and generally lacking in social skills. This is, unfortunately, completely true.

However, this does not mean that we do not have a proud history, a tradition of annoying others with mind-numbing trivia, quotes from popular entertainment, or flaming each other with ‘X can beat-up Y for Z reasons’ missives.

Yet, many nerds are unaware of their long and storied lineage. They know not of Flavius Myopicus, who wrote the first gladiator-based fanfic. The name John ‘DethLord’ Baker, the first nerd to ever misspell ‘death’ on purpose, is not given the reverence it is due.

To remedy this, I have done extensive research (10, 15 minutes tops) on the nerds, dorks, and geeks who shaped modern nerdom and now present to you, the Nerds of Yore.

The Ur-Nerd
Considered by many scholars to be the first true nerd, precious little is known about the Ur-Nerd, save that he was of Sumerian descent and probably didn’t get a date to the prom.

The only record of the Ur-Nerd is a single stele known as the Stele of the Geek. Inscribed on it is what scholars believe is the first ‘rant,’ which details the Ur-Nerds thoughts on why Gilgamesh could totally kick Marduk’s butt.

The Stele is currently housed in the British Museum and is only displayed to patrons who know what Kirk’s brother’s name was.

Tomorrow: Geekus Maximus.

Note: Kirk’s brother’s name was George Samuel Kirk, Jr.

Note: Yes, I’m a nerd.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Does reading your blog and sometimes replying makes me a nerd?

Anonymous said...

So, are we talking about historical Gilgamesh, or the Gilgamesh from the 'Girl Genius' webcomic? Steampunk-style mad-science always wins. :D

Jason Janicki said...

I can't say for sure, but probably :)

Can't the historic Gilgamesh also be a mad scientist? 'Cause that would really be cool :)