The other day, I was busy at work, assembling a bathroom as part of a level I’m working on.
NOTE: I’m currently a level designer. I construct levels for video games. I did not actually build a bathroom. Well, I did, but in the game. Not in real life. I have actually built bathrooms in real life. Really. Ergo: I can build bathrooms in a variety of realities.
My boss happened into the office and said “What’re you working on?”
“A bathroom,” I replied, not adding the ‘duh’ on the end.
He paused for a second. “Why?”
I turned to look at him. “So the bad guys have a place to poop.”
He considered that. “Cool.”
I then showed him the kitchen I’d built (again, in the game, though I have built kitchens in real life too). I did not bother to tell him that that was where the bad guys got the food that they then turned into poop.
This is actually something that bugs in video games and a lot of movies. There are never bathrooms. You see the occasional kitchen and plenty of barracks, but you rarely ever see a bathroom. Doom 3, for example, had plenty of closets for critters to attack you from, but only two bathrooms in the entire game. They both happened to be towards the beginning of the game, which leads me to believe that the poor guys at the far end of the complex either had to learn to hold it or were issued Depends as part of their standard uniform.
Later: Part 2 brought to you by the number 2.
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2 comments:
Interesting. I actually think that since the mid 90s are so there have been too many bathrooms in games. Every gritty, 'realistic' shooter needs to put a bathroom in there, to show how gritty they are.
Having said that: Albion, the RPG I worked on in 94/95 had bathrooms, both in the futuristic spaceship as well as in the houses of the alien race. They were made out of plants, like everything else.
Really? I must be playing a different set of games. Typically, I only notice one bathroom, which is a touch worse than no bathrooms, as you then wonder where the rest of the world goes.
I heard really great things about Albion, though I never played it (and couldn't find it when I went looking, some time after it came out).
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