Tuesday, July 7, 2009

A Fateful Decision

I had to make a terrible, horrible decision the other day. It was about my laundry.
As a preface, I am something of a pack-rat. I save things. Lots of things. I have a 10-pound box of dead batteries because (and I am perfectly serious), they might one day be useful.

Don’t laugh. When aliens invade and their only weakness is a flail made out of dead D-Cells and a ski pole, I will be the one saving the super models.

NOTE: I also have a four-pound ball of tape, a collection of nuts and bolts from various pieces of machinery, my old BB gun that no longer fires, a variety of sports equipment from sports I never played, a saddle, a gross of ping-pong balls from the early ‘80s, a woman’s bowling ball, and an Atari 2600 and about 30-games.

What was I talking about? Oh yes . . .

My laundry.

As I was folding it, I realized that a large percentage of my socks, maybe as high as 40%, had serious holes in them. As in ‘if I’m not careful when I put them on, my foot will actually go through instead of in.’

A decision had to be made. I could save them. I could simply stuff them in the back of my (overflowing, go figure) chest of drawers and forget about them until such time as they were needed to repel the armada from Perseii Omicrom 8.
I could also simply throw them away.

This is not such an easy decision. Some of these socks have been with me since college. They gallantly cushioned my feet when I worked at various part-time jobs. They courageously kept my feet from sweating in the hot California sun and making me smell even worse. They nobly complimented my tennis shoes with their start whiteness. I could not simply discard them like so much trash.

In the end, I threw away some of them, those who were too badly wounded to keep going. I deposited them gently into the garbage can and hummed the bits of ‘taps’ that I could remember. I may have said something moving, something about ‘how their spirit lived on, even as their elastic failed.’ A single tear might have been shed.
The others, the ones that weren’t too far gone, went into a box in the spare room.

Just in case.



Galadriel said...

I tie a knot in holey socks and voila, they are dog toys.

I've read that alkaline batteries can be recharged...once...cautiously...and that they won't hold as much charge as they did the first time. I'm too chicken to try.

TX_Val said...

Well I've got you beat on the atari 2600 Games. When i packed them up for the move. I need to get them out and show my daughter how AWESOME pit fall was, and indiana jones.

I bought my woman and NES, and they play super mario brothers 3 together. So she knows the difference between that and the PS2 and Wii.

I didn't keep my Odyessy though.

Yeah I have a large batch of batteries, I keep telling myself I'm going to recycle them, so they don't end up in a land fill, I'm just lazy.

OH, how about 3 1/2 and 5 1/4 floppies, I have way to many of those I'm hanging onto for some reason. Boxes of them.

:) Even have a few 8" from a trash80.

Jason Janicki said...

Hmmmm, now I just need a dog :)

Oh, 5 1/4 floppies! I have maybe a hundred of those. I don't have quite as many 3 1/2s, but I've got a few.

I never did get Pitfall or Indiana Jones, but I did have River Raid, Space Invaders, Pac Man, Defender, Warlords, and the one with the fly that shot at the mothership-thing.

Man, what was that called? This is gonna bug me (no pun intended) for days.

Gillsing said...

I get holes in my tubesocks. Always at the heel, and also at the big toe on some of them. The hole at the heel is the serious one, but I've found out that I can just flip the sock over and wear it 'backwards', putting the heel-hole at the upper-front side of the foot, where it doesn't even show, due to the sock being somewhat scrunched together where the foot meets the leg. I'm so cheap.

Jason Janicki said...

That's actually rather clever (which explains why I didn't think of it).

Seriously, that is really clever. I'm totally going to do that!

Thanks, Gillsing!