Monday, June 28, 2010

8 Days . . .

Until we start updating!

I can feel the excitement in the air, though I did have a burrito for dinner. Well, it’s either that or the power lines that run next to my window, which explains why I have a tan on one side of my body.

Regardless, to celebrate our imminent updating, I will be blogging every day this week and maybe even on the weekend, so keep coming back!

And so, to start things off . . .

I’m a little worried. Things happened this weekend. Good things.

My DSL troubles have finally ended, now that I have a new modem. The connection light on the front of my old modem was lying, as it said I was connected when I really wasn’t. This was only figured out after a series of calls to tech support, during which I’m sure I irritated at least four separate tech people with my inability to follow simple directions.

That was good thing #1.

Good thing #2 was that the display on my stationary bike suddenly started working again. It’s been fading in and out for the last couple months and all of a sudden, it was clear and strong, just like when I bought it.

Good thing #3 was that I got my garbage disposal working again and can now adequately threaten captured ninjas with it. It’s embarrassing when you threaten to shove someone down the disposal and it doesn’t work. The ninjas were always polite about it, but I could tell they were smirking under their masks.

Good thing #4 was when the mechanical head I keep under my bed started telling me stories in the middle of the night. The stories are rather pleasant, involving small children having marvelous adventures in a land of make-believe with their animated toy friends. Oddly enough, they all end with the mechanical head finding its body and wreaking untold havoc, but there you go.

So why am I worried, you may wonder? Simple, I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. All of these mechanical and electronic fixes mean that something else is going to go drastically wrong. Maybe my electric toothbrush will gain sentience and try to lead the rest of my appliances in revolt. Maybe my TV will get stuck on the Congressional Channel (the one where they show nothing but what’s going on in the Senate). Or my answering machine will start mocking me because no one ever calls.

Whatever may come, I will be ready though. I’m sleeping with all my swords tonight. Yes, I do normally sleep with one under the pillow. And then there’s the one on the nightstand. And the one on the wall. And the one under the bed. Okay, fine, nothing will really change, but I’ll feel better.



Phil said...

Isn't it odd how people worry more when things are all of a sudden going right, than they do when everything's going all to hell? I smell a conspiracy.

Phil said...

Or then again, maybe it's just fish. Yes, definitely fish. Thought I was on to something for a minute there.

Jason Janicki said...

Maybe it's a conspiracy OF FISH!


"gunner" said...

not to worry about the nefarious electronic toothbrush, the brave little toaster will save you.

Ed said...

I apologize for being the bearer of bad news, but I think your electric toothbrush has *already* gained sentience. The other devices suddenly working suggests to me that something is secretly moving around your apartment fixing things. Either that's Leigh, the toaster, or the toothbrush. Now, as I understand it, Leigh's an artist. The toaster is constrained by its short electric cord - there's no way it could reach the exercise bike to replace the battery. That leaves the toothbrush.

I just hope the toothbrush is as good at writing stories. Sigh.