Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Krunk Funny!: Part 2

Wait, where was I? Oh yes . . .

So what kind of comedy would orcs prefer? I’m going to guess that keen observational comedy or political satires really aren’t their thing. I would suspect that their tastes run to simpler fair. Think broad physical humor such as Abbot and Costello. Only as orcs. With swords. And one of them dies at end.

Simple word plays would also probably prove very popular.

“Knock knock.

Who’s there?

The orc.

The orc who?

The orc who’s going to kill you, desecrate your remains, and then burn down your home!”

Though not really comedy, I would imagine that sleight-of-hand would also go over very well.

“And now, sawing a Man in half!” Proceeds to saw a Man in half to riotous cheering.

Despite its simple structures and penchant for bloodletting and outright savagery, I would hesitate to call orc comedy lowbrow. I would imagine there would be a delicate undercurrent to their work, an almost melancholy air as the orc comedians struggle to define and illuminate the rich culture and history of their people. Their examinations of cherished orc traditions, their (perhaps unsubtle) views of the world hold up a mirror to the orc peoples and ask ‘Is this all we are? Can we not find a place where we can all live in peace?’

Actually, no. I’m totally messing with you. Orc comedy basically revolves around orcs killing others and each other horribly. And yes, I majored in English (hence the truly amazing b.s. of the preceding paragraph).

If I had to guess, I would say the Mouth of Sauron got his start as a comedian:



TX_Val said...

HA, one of the ninja's has gotten bored.

"Police: 'Nicotine Ninja' prefers brand-name cigs"

Well hell, why would you steal the cheap brands?

Jason Janicki said...

Unfortunately, the link didn't work. Looks like Yahoo's already pulled down the article.

Bummer, I'm always up for a good ninja story :)

TX_Val said...

I found it in a few other places, though the facts vary some, it's close to the same.

The yahoo title i pasted last time.. here's the article from
Colorado Police Search for 'Nicotine Ninja' in Theft of $120,000 Worth of Cigarettes

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

GOLDEN, Colo. ­ Jefferson County authorities are looking a man they've dubbed the "Nicotine Ninja" believed to be responsible for stealing $120,000 worth of cigarettes.

The suspect is completely clad in dark clothing and covers half his face with a black cloth when he breaks into liquor stores in the middle of the night, authorities said.

The man is believed to be responsible for 118 burglaries across the metro area during the last two years.

He usually only takes brand-name cigarettes and ignores the generic brands, authorities said.

My main thought was... why steal generics, people only smoke them cause they're cheaper. Not because they're better. That and if he's stealing that many, he's probably doing some kind of resale, and obviously there's more money in the brand names.

Either way.. you have to reign the ninja's in.. .

(i used foxnews because it was one of the only news sites that a quick search turned up, to many others were just blogs)