Evil Mastermind: A Career Choice: Part 1

It has occurred to me that I might want to become an evil mastermind. It seems like a good career move. There is lots of money, cool gadgets, sexy women, and gigantic underground bases (often with lasers). On the downside, people will occasionally try to kill you, but every job has its drawbacks.

So the question becomes, how do you do this? My local Community College does not have any courses in evil, I checked. Not even Evil 1: Intro to Villainy. It does have a course titled Teen Movies of the 80s, which might count as torture, but I digress.

The primary requisite for being an Evil Mastermind seems to be money. This is a major stumbling block, as I can barely afford gum, much less a pit full of rabid, man-eating iguanas. The best I could do would be a bucket of used cat litter. While this is nasty, I do not think it would deter James Bond.

I do not think I could get a loan, as Building an Evil Lair would probably get a laugh out of the bank manager, but very little cash. Maybe I could turn to some sort of web-based enterprise, perhaps a web-comic. Yes, surely that is the road to untold wealth (hey, I can dream).

Up next: the Lair