Furbomb the Wonder Cat

A co-worker walked up to me the other day and said, and I quote “What’s the deal with Krypto the Superdog?”

“He’s a dog from Krypton that has all the powers of Superman,” I replied.

“Huh,” said my co-worker after a moment’s reflection. “That’s kind of stupid.”

“Yeah,” I said. “But not as bad as Bat-Dog.”

“True,” and then he wandered away.

NOTE: This sort of conversation is in no way strange at my work. What was odd was that nobody chimed in with their opinion. We once had a twenty-minute discussion among six people about whether or not a vampire could be turned into a zombie. Most of us said ‘no,’ save for one guy who insisted it was possible. This conversation included two leads and a member of upper-management.

Anyway, this brings me to today’s topic: Why are there no super cats? There’s Krypto the Wonder Dog, Bat-Dog, Wonder Dog, and Hoppy the Marvel Bunny (no, not making that up). Mister Talky Tawny doesn’t count (being a phooka). I’m sure I’m missing tons of super animals, but this is all my brain could dredge up.

NOTE: Catwoman has probably had a number of exceptional cats. I’m thinking more along the lines of animals with super powers. Granted, Bat-Dog doesn’t have any, but neither does Batman. And no, I don’t want to have an argument about whether or not the Batman is a Super Hero or a Hero.

So, yeah. No cats with super powers. Frankly, this smacks of species-ism. Cats, as many people will argue, are just as loyal, loving, and intelligent as dogs, if not more so. This is why I have decided to create the world’s first super cat: Furbomb the Wonder Cat.

Owned by a kindly, but forgetful little old lady, Furbomb gained his powers after eating a magical canary that had been the pet of famed wizard Dumbl- errrr Merlin. Yeah, Merlin. Furbomb gained super strength, invulnerability, a yowl that can crack concrete, and the ability to shed explosively, hence the name.

Now a super hero, Furbomb spends his days decimating the populations of small mammals and birds (and the occasional small plane or car) within a tri-state area, sharpening his claws on anything he wants to, napping on something warm (nuclear reactors, house fires, volcanoes), and getting his tummy rubbed by his owner.

Actually, scratch that (no pun intended). A super cat would be a really bad idea.

Cheers,
-Jason