Signs: Part 1

As you may or may not have noticed, Leigh and I attended the Wizard World: Texas con this last week. This entailed that we get on a plane, which involves an elaborate ritual known as ‘going through security.’

Now, I am fine with all that. I will happily remove my shoes, belt, cell-phone, necklace, titanium skull plate, and Kryptonite toe (in case I have to fight Superman) and pass them through the metal detector like any other good citizen. This is not a problem, though I do take extra effort to ensure that my pants don’t fall down when I’m walking through the metal detector. Trust me, you only need to have it happen once, especially if you do it in front of a bus-load of Japanese schoolgirls on a vacation to the US. Schoolgirls who happen to have their cameras out and aren’t shy about pointing and laughing.

Moving on.

Anyhow, as Leigh and I were in the Disneyland-esque winding maze of partitions that lead to the metal detectors, holding up our pants with one hand, I happened to notice a sign. It read ‘Thank you for participating in security.’

This struck me as odd. The sign was somehow suggesting that we were voluntarily choosing to partially disrobe and allow strangers to wave metal devices at us (which I would do happily, assuming the people with the wands were attractive women).

It was just the idea that we were somehow not obligated to participate. Obviously, we didn’t have to, but we also wouldn’t be allowed to get on the plane. I would also bet that if we tried to get on the plane anyway, many hundreds of pounds of TSA agents would attempt to subdue us. Repeatedly.

So what am I saying? Let’s just call a spade a spade and point out that a more accurate sign would read ‘Thank you for cooperating with security.’ A sentence which happens to have the same number of characters (I checked).

Now, I am in no way shape or form suggesting that we shouldn’t have security in our airports. I am glad measures are being taken to prevent bad people from doing bad things while very far above the ground. However, let’s not mess around with an illusion of choice. You want to get on a plane? You allow security to do their thing.

Now I’m curious if the IRS building has a sign that reads ‘Thank you for cooperating in paying your taxes.’

Tomorrow: Part II: Texas bathrooms are more dangerous than they appear.