Rock-Jackhammer-Scissors

I’m assuming you’re familiar with Rock-Paper-Scissors (aka Jan-Ken-Pon or Rochambeau). If you’re not, it’s a simple game where you acquire two of each object (a rock, a piece of paper, and a scissors), give one set to each person, and then when the whistle blows, you attempt to kill your opponent with one of the objects. Scissors scores one point, as it’s the easiest to kill with. Rock scores two points, and Paper scores ten points, as it’s really hard to kill someone with a single sheet of paper. No one really knows why they bother keeping score, I suppose it’s because very few people would otherwise pick Paper.

Note: Obviously, the preceding paragraph is completely false. Strangely enough, most of what I write is completely false. This paragraph itself is also likely false. It’s like a Zen koan of stupidity.

However, why Rock, Paper, and Scissors? Why those three objects? Rock and Scissors are kinda dangerous, so okay. Why Paper though? Obviously, it’s because Scissors can cut Paper, but Scissors can cut lots of thing. It could have been Rock, String, Scissors’ or ‘Rock, Pants, Scissors’ or ‘Rock, Hairball, Scissors.’

And yes, I’ve cut a hairball with scissors.

I’m just curious as to why those three things were picked. They just seem so random.

It was like some guy thought ‘Hey, I need three things that are diametrically opposed’ and glancing around his room, picked out three things completely at random. It could have been ‘Spitoon, Blunderbuss, Panties.’

Personally, I would have gone for ‘Nose, Finger, Booger.’ Obviously, Finger picks Nose, Nose blows out Booger, and Booger sticks to Finger.

It has a certain symmetry.

Cheers,
-Jason